What’s in a Name?

Before we get into the latest issue to arise from the ongoing string of issues flowing like an open sewer from the bowels of the Vashon Park District (VPD), I would first like to report on some good news that is parks related. This of course has nothing to do with any action performed by the VPD board of commissioners, or anyone else there. As it was, I happened to have some birthday money left over, so I took a sterile jar from the boiling pot of water on my stovetop and gathered a water sample of the effluent streaming from the open pipe coming off the VES Field and took it to a water testing lab in Tacoma. After waiting a little over a week, I received the results of the tests for nitrates and arsenic that were arrived at through EPA testing methods 300 and 200.8. Not really knowing what the resulting numbers meant, I was assured by water experts Michael Laurie and Susie Kalhorn that .003 mg/L of arsenic and 1.1 mg/L of nitrates were both far below health and safety standards. This does put at least one aspect of the water concerns at VES to rest, so we will leave that issue for the moment and turn to the latest revelation from the ongoing goings on at the latest bi-weekly Ober Obfuscation Fest (OOF).
 
Following a horse park dust up that ended with a quarter of the people in attendance exiting the building and leaving the rest of us to wonder what that was all about, we got into the meatier aspect of the evening’s meeting. This, as pretty much always as of late, had to do with the continued spending of borrowed monies in an effort to finish work on the VES field in the hopes that what has been completed by the 30 June completion deadline imposed by the Washington State Recreation and Conservation Office (RCO) will allow the VPD to be given the last of the matching grant funds offered to this project. As per usual during this part of the show, we got percentages of completion of the various aspects of this project as recited by project manager Mike Mattingly. The best part of the entertainment generally comes when we get into the great toilet debate and the discussion meanders far and wide as to how much of a fudge factor the RCO will tolerate regarding the facility that is finally put in place. It should be pointed out that "fudge factor" was an actual term used in this discussion, so you see, humor can be found even in the darkest corners of this debacle, whether it was intended or not.
 
As it was left a little less than a week ago, a rolling three-holer that was supposedly sitting in a dealer’s lot in Elkhart, Indiana was the sanitary object of everyone’s desire in terms of getting the job done as far as a VES restroom facility was concerned. It had been determined with certainty that the RCO would not accept a rented or leased facility, and it seemed that they were not enthusiastic about this moveable, multi-commode model. But we were assured that this was the last great hope in a stab at finishing this mess in a fashion that might approach what the RCO has in mind. There was, of course, much back and forth around the room as to what that ultimate, finished result my be. One would have thought that someone might have inquired and confirmed what this perfect picture might look like in the collective mind of the RCO, but that of course would have required thinking on this end. Instead, we hear from Commissioner Ameling that what he has in mind is to push any obstructionist "functionaries" aside and go straight to the real deciders for a decision- presumably one Mr. Ameling has in mind as the "right" one. I thought that the particular functionary in question here, Laura Moxham with the RCO, might be interested in this exchange, so I sent her a link showing the video record of this part of the potty discussion. While I received a thank you acknowledgement of her receipt of my email, I have no idea if she watched the video. If you are interested, you are welcome and encouraged to see it on the youtubes at this address: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rAT5xwITaCA . While the entire eight and one half minutes is instructional, the relevant RCO segment begins at about the two minute mark.
 
The biggest revelation in all of this, though, was that Commissioner Hackett had arranged a $25,000 naming rights deal on the mobile pooper. While it was an unscientific survey, the one other commissioner I asked about this had no idea that said deal had transpired until Mr. Hackett’s mentioning it at the meeting, continuing the board’s unbroken string of surprises and backroom dealings in spite of their continuing promises of transparency of operations. But the biggest surprise here was that the naming deal was dependent on the wheeled water closet having a place for a concession stand as well, which this trailered toilet does not. While visions of ads for Mr. X’s Log and Dog House flashed in my brain, another thought crept in, as it had to since it was a serious thought fighting its way through all the mirth and merriment that the logs and dogs had stirred up. That thought was fueled by Mr. Mattingly’s assurance that they could "build on" a concession stand. What was not talked about in the wake of this blow by, besides the ethics and desirability of unilateral decisions on the commercialization of public facilities, was what the added cost of tacking a health department approved food concession space on the super pooper from Elkhart might add to the already overspent VES budget. I’m sure Mr. Ameling could find some functionaries to sweep aside to get this done, but we are still awaiting the verdict from his previous condescending gesture toward the powers that be. Stay tuned for more excitement next time as the clock ticks down on the life and times of the Vashon Park District. And if you just can’t wait till the next riveting episode (25 June-7pm, Ober Park), you could always tune in to my vimeo channel on the internets, and watch a comedic one minute summary of how I feel after spending one to two hours behind the camera at the VPD Board of Commissioners meetings. Sometimes, in spite of it all, you just have to laugh.
https://vimeo.com/66617801